homily on Matthew 18:21–19:1:The Freedom of Forgiving  ( 14-8-25)

 A heartfelt homily on Matthew 18:21–19:1 showing how forgiveness frees the heart and heals families, ( 14-8-25)

Praise be to Jesus Christ

There was a man who used to keep a small box hidden under his bed. In that box he had the habit of keeping small pieces of paper on each of it he wrote a hurt someone had caused him. A harsh word, a broken promise, a debt never repaid etc.  Whenever he was feeling angry, he  had the habit of opening the box and read the papers again, feeling the pain all over. Years passed, and the box became full. One day his child found it and asked, “Papa, why do you keep all these bad things?” The man could not answer. That night, he burned the box and after long time in years, he slept peacefully.

Peter asks Jesus in today’s Gospel, “How many times must I forgive my brother? Seven times?” Jesus answers, “Not seven, but seventy times seven.” Jesus is not giving us a number to count. He is showing us that forgiveness is not about keeping score. It is about keeping the heart free.

In the Old Testament, Lamech once boasted that he would take revenge seventy-seven times. Jesus turns this upside down. Where sin multiplied, forgiveness must overflow. God’s way is not revenge but mercy. We see it in Joseph, who forgave his brothers who sold him. We see it in David, who spared Saul though Saul tried to kill him. Both chose to break the chain of hatred.

Saint John Paul II once said, “Forgiveness is the restoration of freedom to oneself. It is the key held in our own hand to set ourselves free.” Often we think forgiving someone is doing them a favour. But in truth, it is first a gift we give ourselves. The man with the box could not be happy because he kept his hurts as treasures. When he let go, peace came back.

In our families, wounds come easily. A sharp word between husband and wife, a misunderstanding with a brother, a promise forgotten by a friend. If we keep every hurt in a secret box in our heart, joy will have no space to live. Sometimes, the other person may never say sorry. Yet Jesus asks us to forgive, not because they deserve it, but because He has forgiven us first.

Saint Teresa of Calcutta said, “If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive.” Love and forgiveness walk together. Without one, the other will die. Even in religious life, brothers and sisters in the same community may hurt each other in small ways. A forgiving heart can turn a cold house into a warm home.

Forgiving seventy times seven does not mean allowing injustice or pretending the wrong never happened. It means choosing to heal rather than to wound again. It means speaking the truth with kindness, as the Lord does with us.

We will never be more like God than when we forgive. On the cross, Jesus prayed, “Father, forgive them,” even as they nailed Him to the wood. If we let those words enter our own hearts, the heavy boxes we have carried for years will be gone, and we will find rest.

Lord, give me the gift of forgiveness. Amen.